Tarzan

One day, Ken complained to his friend, "My elbow
really hurts. I guess I should see a doctor." His
friend said, "Don't do that!!! There's a computer at
the drug store that can diagnose anything, quicker and
cheaper than a doctor. Simply put in a sample of your
urine and the computer will diagnose your problem and
tell you what you can do about it. It only costs
£5.00." Ken figured he had nothing to lose, so he
filled a jar with a urine sample and went to the drug
store. Finding the computer, he poured in the sample
and deposited the £5.00. The computer started making
some noises and the various lights started flashing.
After a brief pause out popped a small slip of paper
on which was printed: You have tennis elbow. Soak your
arm in warm water. Avoid heavy labor. It will be
better in two weeks. Late that evening while thinking
how amazing this new technology was and how it would
change medical science forever, he began to wonder if
this machine could be fooled. He decided to give it a
try. He mixed together some tap water, a stool sample
from his dog and urine samples from his wife and
daughter. To top it off, he masturbated into the
concoction. He went back to the drug store, located
the machine, poured in the sample and deposited the
£5.00. The machine again made the usual noise and
printed out the following analysis: Your tap water is
too hard. Get a water softener. Your dog has worms.
Give him vitamins. Your daughter's using cocaine. Put
her in a rehabilitation clinic. Your wife's pregnant -
twin girls. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer. And if
you don't stop jerking off, Your tennis elbow will
never get better.

__________________

A cigarette shortens your life by 2 min..
A beer shortens your life by 4 min..
A working day shortens your life by 8 hours!!!!..